I wanted to write tonight and just share a little more of my life... (side note: I just returned from the ER with a severe knee sprain. Pain pills have kicked in and I wanted to gab. This is where I ended up. Therefore, anything said on here should be taken with a grain of salt and held in strict confidence...lol)
My annulment should have been finalized last week, but due to my lack of legal knowledge and funds for an attorney, I messed up my filing and now need to resubmit papers. Not what I wanted to hear. As far as I am concerned I am single. Have been since I kicked his sorry butt out of my house the week before Christmas. Now to finalize. Ugh. What a mess. Another lesson learned.
On a lighter note, I am dating a super nice guy... He just kind of fell into my life when I least expected it. He is amazing. I will share the details later. I think you'll love him as much as I do...
I've been thinking a lot about what I want out of life and how I am going to make that happen. I wonder sometimes about the choices I am making and wish I could see how these things will turn out, but lucky for us all, we don't get to see the end of the story until, well, until it comes to an end. So we endure with faith and pray we are doing right. I don't want much. I just want to finish my degree, (more learning) get back to work, and find someone to share my life with who can appreciate all I have to offer. Someone to love me and Hannah and want to stick around for the right reasons. Not too much to ask, right?
Anyway... rattling on... A friend of mine shared this with me today. Kind of sums up what I have been dealing with over the past year. But let me tell you, today was a good day (minus the trip to the ER). I finally feel like I am coming back to life. It was like someone switched on a light... I haven't felt this alive in a year. I am so thankful right now that things are getting better. My prayers have been heard and I know that things are going to work out. I have amazing friends who love me and I don't know what I would do without them.
"After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul.
You learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security.
You begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises.
You begin to accept your defeats with the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child.
You learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans, and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.
After a while, you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure...
That you really are strong and you really do have worth.
And you learn.
And learn...
With every goodbye, you learn."
